When you’re burned out, taking care of yourself (or your family) can feel nearly impossible. Therapist KC Davis gets it, and she’s got a message for anyone struggling with daily tasks: you’re not lazy. Care tasks, she says, are neither good nor bad — they’re morally neutral. Davis offers creative shortcuts and workarounds for everything from using wet wipes when you can’t manage a shower to sealing dirty dishes in a giant zip-loc until you feel up to washing them. Because regardless of your mental health struggles, you are a person worthy of a functional space.
KC Davis is a licensed professional therapist, author, speaker, and founder of Struggle Care. KC Davis began her therapy journey at 16 when she entered treatment for drug addiction. Today, she teaches a compassionate and practical approach to self & home care for those dealing with mental health, physical illness, and hard seasons of life. Her methodology has attracted 1M+ followers on social media in less than a year. Her Amazon bestselling book, “How to Keep House While Drowning,” has sold 40,000+ copies. KC lives in Houston with her husband and two daughters. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx
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Thank You ♥️
i love her so much❤
Don't get prego if you can't handle the work that comes with having a child! Oh my bad, she's a comedian! I raised 3 sons before Social Media. I think she's just trying to make some money!
God I love her. I just have cardboard boxes in my closet
I don't have the words to express how life changing this is for me.
I have just finished for the term & my room was to say the very least… a bombsite & i had done laundry once in 3.5 months. i was and am so ashamed but i let my parents help me get it all sorted and come home for the holidays. next term i will do better & this talk has made that seem so much more doable
No one seems to understand when I say, “anything worth doing is worth doing poorly”.
This is how iv been doing these care tasks for YEARS, it helped me, severe adhd and anxieties.
I care for my family, but Dam, now I'm depressed, what am I going to do….. cattle prod! If half of them could lift a finger now and then, it would be so much easer!
Men should not mate and give women with a history of mental illness, 3 kids. I was raised by 2 parents that are mentally ill. They married each other. 🙁
I have no kids but all these issues. 🙂
No, this idea is not for me. I clean when I am depressed, because it helps me get my mind in order. If I let the house go for too long (over a week) then I go down the gurgler with the unwashed dishes. I need it. I also don't agree with giving yourself a hard time when you're really low (what's depression but anger turned inwards) but some of the ideas here can be very useful. Breaking tasks down, to manageable levels, doing what's necessary and no more. Being kind to yourself is the only way, but sometimes that does mean pushing yourself to get a task done.
I have managed to find a lot of work-arounds for a lot of things in my life, managed to make a lot of things morally neutral, as you say, but one thing that still defeats me every time is the cats' litter boxes. I am so utterly confounded and overwhelmed by poop that I don't even know where to begin. Does anyone here have any ideas? My issues are: autism, type-2 diabetes with diabetic neuropathy, morbid obesity (work in progress, getting better), depression, anxiety, hoarding (not the poop kind of hoarding, I promise!), asthma, bad back, bad knees, and Meniere's Syndrome (dizziness, headaches). It's a laundry list of (morally neutral) character defects, I know! But right now, my main problem is litter boxes!
I’ve never folded laundry, hanging laundry is even tough. Sometimes I just keep two laundry bins and pull my clean clothes from that pile. My clothes aren’t ever wrinkled. If it something that needs to be perfect or is prone to wrinkles like my work shirt, I just hang the one.
I cried the first time I watched this and saved it to watch again when would need encouragement and here I am back again watching for a third time. This is so meaningful and I’m going to buy the book. Thank you for your words and compassion
I needed this
I had a fallout with my family early this year. I received a 4 page letter describing in detail how I've disappointed my mother. This is what I wish I had heard 5 months ago. Thank you.
You nailed describing it entirely.
I feel as though she’s enabling the depressive behavior. I have a close friend who just acknowledged myself on this and honestly, I couldn’t agree more. Her mood is very low so if your in that kind of negative state, you’re most likely going to agree with it. But when you really think about it, you need to think far, far in the other direction. Because YOU CAN wake up and make a difference in this world. Your heart beats for a purpose, and that purpose is you!!❤ 💫
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This is a great sentiment but for me personally being a type A personality, I cannot do anything halfway. Do it all or not at all is how I was raised by two silent generationers. So the days I don't wanna do anything, I don't. The days I do–this house is spotless.
Nobody cared for me as a child. Now I am a mother of four and have no idea who I am. Daily tasks are incredibly hard for me. I just wanted to thank you for being so open to talking about this.
🔴🌏The Rich stayed ruched my investing like the rich and spending like the poor while the poor remains poor by investing like the rich yet not investing
Beautiful. Kindly delivered.
I've been living with chronic illness for 8 years, I'll be 32 next week. When I first got sick I couldn't walk or bathe myself anymore. I am so happy to have regained enough of my health to be able to not only move, but keep house. I'm also grateful that my husband works from home and does all he can when he's not in sessions. For some, this wouldn't be enough but for me I feel alive again. We can't buy a home or have a family, but we're happy.
Insta made me cry. Hearing an accepting voice is so important.
OMG my house looks exactly the same!
This is so on point! I needed this. Thank you!!!
Love your message and love you. At 70 I’m a new therapist , graduating in 2017. My new boss has presented me the approach called LI LIFESPAN INTEGRATION
Η βοντιανοβα είπε αγαπάτε αλλήλους η Ναταλία φυσικά χαχα
I can’t describe how much I was thrilled when I read the title of this talk, finally someone is dealing with the laundry problem, I’m not alone
Yes yes yes!! I needed this Soo much!
I love this. Thank you so much.